Wacky polls!

Wednesday, May 2nd, 2012 @ 11:18 am | Politics

This is hilarious: Mitt Romney has a 38.7% favorability rating. This is clearly impossible, as nobody likes Mitt Romney. When was the last time you heard a Republican say, “Man, I just really like Mitt Romney”? You haven’t. You’ve never said it. Nobody has said it. Even his family members are all, Obama’s pretty cool too, is even great. Okay, outside of the family and other Mormons, nobody says they like Mitt Romney. He is likable in the way you look at a LED television showing you magical worlds that don’t exist: gee, what a neat effect. He gets up there and looks presidential, and then he opens his mouth and it’s continuous garbage. It’s all about some Straw Man Obama that makes sense only to Republicans hopped up on Fox and rightwing conspiracy bloggers. It’s about saying the stimulus didn’t work when it worked. It’s about saying he is against Obama’s health care plan when he told Obama to adopt his Massachusetts program and Obama replied, ‘Okay, sure! Now we can all celebrate universal health care together!’ It’s about saying he was for the bin Laden operation when he wasn’t before. It’s about pretending he would be capable of that 50/50 roll of the international dice when he still thinks we’re battling the Soviets. It’s about promising us Bush, Updated Inc. and telling us that we need to return to the policies that led directly to the Great Recession and the debt that resulted.

I was about to go back through and provide links, but please…everybody knows this stuff. Because you can’t build illusions about a guy you don’t like, and nobody likes Mitt Romney. And Mitt Romney asks only one thing of us, that we forget everything we know about Mitt Romney and just hand him the job, please, because it’s his turn.

How bloody charming.

Anyhow, don’t look for this number to improve in the next six months as people start paying attention and learning about the man. More gaffes and blunders are on the way, because no matter how nice the LED television looks, you never actually get confused and think you’re battling orcs in Middle-Earth. Ironically, Romney may be at his most authentic when he is an image in a lie-filled advertisement, paid for by One-Percenter SuperPACs.

-hw

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